Resources - paragraph basics

Malc Prentice

THis page is for checking the absolute basics of style.

Here is a very short, bad paragraph

The weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, but there was a lot to see.

I saw some castles, some museums, got sick, and played hiking in some beatiful mountains.

When I was younger I went to Kyoto - it had a castle too.

Each paragraph below is the same, but one problem has been solved. What problem?

1

The weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, but there was a lot to see. I saw some castles, some museums, got sick, and played hiking in some beatiful mountains. When I was younger I went to Kyoto - it had a castle too.

This paragraph is better because it doesn't start each sentence on a new line

2

The weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, but there was a lot to see. I saw some castles, some museums, got sick, and played hiking in some beatiful mountains. When I was younger I went to Kyoto - it had a castle too.

This paragraph is better because...

3

In my winter holidays this year I went to Scotland - I enjoyed the trip, but there were bad points and good points. The weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, but there was a lot to see. I saw some castles, some museums, got sick, and played hiking in some beatiful mountains. When I was younger I went to Kyoto - it had a castle too. I recommend you visit Scotland, but go in August, because the weather will be better and the festivals will be on.

This paragraph is better because...

4

In my winter holidays this year I went to Scotland - I enjoyed the trip, but there were bad points and good points. The weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, but there was a lot to see. I saw some castles, some museums, got sick, and played hiking in some beatiful mountains. When I was younger I went to Kyoto - it had a castle too. I recommend you visit Scotland, but go in August, because the weather will be better.

This paragraph is better because...

5

In my winter holidays this year I went to Scotland - I enjoyed the trip, but there were bad points and good points. The weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, but there was a lot to see. I saw some castles, some museums, got sick, and played hiking in some beatiful mountains. When I was younger I went to Kyoto it had a castle too. I recommend you visit Scotland, but go in August, because the weather will be better.

This paragraph is better because ...

6

In my winter holidays this year I went to Scotland - I enjoyed the trip, but there were bad points and good points. The weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, but there was a lot to see and I got sick. I saw some castles, some museums, got sick, and played hiking in some beatiful mountains. I recommend you visit Scotland, but go in August, because the weather will be better.

This paragraph is better because ...

7

In my winter holidays this year I went to Scotland - I enjoyed the trip, but there were bad points and good points. On one hand, the weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, and I got sick. However, I saw some castles, some museums, and played hiking in some beatiful mountains. In summary, I recommend you visit Scotland, but go in August, because the weather will be better.

This paragraph is better because ...

In my winter holidays this year I went to Scotland - I enjoyed the trip, but there were bad points and good points. On one hand, the weather was terrible, and the food wasn't so good, and I got sick. However, I saw some castles, some museums, and went hiking in some beautiful mountains. In summary, I recommend you visit Scotland, but go in August, because the weather will be better.

This paragraph is better because